“Laughter is an instant vacation,” said Milton Berle. Here at NK, we would like to contribute to lightening your mood in preparation for a meaningful and relaxed weekend. So here’s the tongue-in-cheek look at the events of the week gone by that you’ve been waiting for :)
‘In God’s Name’ is the title of a book by David A Yallop published in 1984 that sought to chronicle an investigation into the death of Pope John Paul I. The rumour was that he was murdered after just 33 days as Pope …in God’s name.
The phrase took on a whole new meaning in Sabarimala this week. Protestors and channels took the side of the deity, interpreting his thoughts based on their own perceptions, and put them into action, preventing women devotees from accessing the temple despite the Supreme Court’s order, and a feeble attempt by the State Government to enforce it.
It’s a matter of faith not law was the argument as indeed the dissenting judgment stated. Quite so; can’t have faith in the law, when the law itself has no faith. Even journalists who came to witness a revolution, were revolved 360 degrees and pointed the way back and if they insisted on going forward, the full force of the faithful devolved on them. What the Court proposes, the Lord, not the law, disposes.
The minister of state for external affairs resigned after his previous attempts to practise the art of diplomacy rather undiplomatically, came to light on twitter. Possibly he was appointed in consideration of his previous experience in external affairs but that is pure speculation, because it is unlikely that his boss knew of his attempts to practise the diplomatic art before he was appointed, his love for twitter notwithstanding. In all there were 21 accusations of inappropriate behaviour with women (thank the Almighty! its probably because section 377 was still in force then) during his days at the Asian Age. I wonder whose choice it was – the name of the newspaper that is so much in other newspapers these days.
Today men look at other men sadly and lament #youtoo? And the more righteous among them point out at other men and say #himtoo. But according to media reports, there was one married man in Maharashtra who said #metoo after a woman colleague made repeated sexual advances to him and was ignored. He committed suicide. The tragedy was that he wrote it down on paper – he didn’t have access to twitter. His family must be bitter especially given that India like the city of Allahabad has a new name in Digital India!
Speaking of new names – The CM of UP and his cabinet have come up with a tongue twister for Allahabad. Prayagraj. But then what is a little tongue sacrifice for the greater good! Why change the name of a city we have lived with for centuries many ask; what’s in a name? Everything. The CM’s original name according to Google is Ajay Singh Bisht. Shakespeare’s famous phrase “A rose by any other name, would smell as sweet!” has become irrelevant, like most things British! Perhaps it was the smell?
News reports suggest that Jamal Kashoggi the Saudi Arabian Journalist who was living in exile in Washington ever since the current crown prince of Saudi Arabia assumed unqualified power, was killed with a bone saw in the Saudi Embassy in Istanbul. Cut into pieces, he will never be able to write his daily piece for the Washington Post. Reports say they chopped his fingers first.
The Post had kept his column blank for some time after his disappearance on Oct. 2nd much like some Indian newspapers did their edit pages during the emergency. But once they knew for certain he would never emerge from the Embassy, other than in a suitcase they published his last piece. But that has given no clue as to where his pieces are…yet. International pressure is increasing on the Saudi Crown Prince to come clean on the journalist’s death; he has held his horses so far but there’s no saying what may happen next. The US of course is more interested in gun parts than body parts and will not lift a finger fearing that like Kashoggi’s finger, it might get chopped off! Nevertheless the president has warned the Saudis of ‘bad bad stuff’ (like a school shooting in Texas?)
Kashoggi was a former Royal insider, but fell out with the current regime for reasons unknown. Saudi Arabia is increasingly adopting Israeli tactics to silence its enemies outside its borders – Understandable given that they have a secret understanding against Iran.
But in India they do it differently! Some portions of the Indian media are learning the spelling of afraid rather quickly – ‘Af raid” – which is an abbreviation for ‘after a raid’! While they may not stop asking questions, they may put a cap on asking the right questions! But there is medicine for that pandemic too (recently there was one) – criminal defamation – that ubiquitous British Indian law that says we have free speech only to the extent of the length of that phrase! Even as we displace British name boards, the British Raj (it has both British and Indian names) prevails. After section 377, 497 isn’t it time for 499 to be defamed, renamed or reframed?
Pakistan is broke and looking for money from anyone willing to lend. They prefer donations. Their loan accounts are already NPA’s. Perhaps its captain will have to play another world cup next year to raise money for his company just as he did for the cancer hospital he built in 1992. India can make an offer – through the hawala route perhaps. There are plenty of people capable of handling the transaction in both countries, lines of control notwithstanding! India could also help them demonetize – that would be doing them a favour, but unfortunately they are not monetized enough!
Last Word
Down south, it was time for an elephantine feast. Dushera. In Sanskrit, since it is the flavour of the day, Dasha Hara means removal of ten bad qualities within you. Unfortunately, politicians do not celebrate it as much as they should.
The elephants are the stars of the final procession, though it means hard work for them, and of course their trainers. They eliminate all their inherent bad qualities, and inculcate, discipline and hard work in themselves to be able to walk in line and carry the golden howdah which weighs over 750 kg in what is known as the Jamboo Savari. If the elephants can do it, why not we? Ah! We have wealth to amass, power to accumulate and elections to win!
In Mangalore during Dushera, there are no elephants, but bears and tigers are visible; Siberian and Indian they delight kids and adults alike and in keeping with the Supreme Court judgement in the Sabarimala case, this year, tigresses (they are naturals!) were on the street, enchanting (not terrorising) people. What a lovely Dushera. Hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Felt like a kid again.
Have a good weekend and a great week ahead.
The author can be contacted at brian@newskarnataka.com
